Paris Rhymes With Whack

I should have known Paris was going to suck when this was the first AD I saw.....

It didn't get much better after that. I came to Paris for two reasons:

1. To visit my summer coworker and Paris guide extraordinaire Holly and
2. To see the Eiffel Tower

So based on those two requirements I guess you can say my visit was successful. But other that that I would say that it was a bust.

I have a Bucket list and on it I have visiting the Eiffel Tower, Roman Collesuim and Egyptian Pyramids. So this was stop 1 of 3 while I´m abroad and to be honest it wasn´t all that impressive. I will say that it creeps up on you faster than a Spanish dude on a blonde at the club tho. I got off the metro at the "Eiffle Tower" stop and couldn´t even see it. I looked around, did the whole awkward 360 tourist with a map spin, then just started following the general flow of people. As soon as I passed a building on my right, BOOM, there it was. The place was packed with tourists including this special lady wearing a brown furry Chris Brown hat:

They decided to close the elevator to the top because it was snowing so all I got was a 2nd level view of the surroundings which was still pretty neat. However I would have liked to see the spot where Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker we´re fighting Kenji. After that I went to the Louve Museum which houses the Mona Lisa...but they like to close on tuesdays...yes tuesdays, so I didn´t get to see squat. I jumped on the metro to see Notre Dame next. I got off and saw the Bird Lady from Home Alone 2´s husband in the park:

After all my sight seeing I met up with Holly, for a little night out. We met at the Moulin Rouge which has extremely over priced tickets to see breast-a-ses.

Especially when I went down the street and got my favorite kind of breast-a-ses for 5 euro:


So far this is the best Chicken I have had outside of the US. 2 piece with hot wings was on point and if I ever go back to Paris, the "Chicken Corner" is my number 1 spot. The Crepes were also pretty good.

It was Australian Day at the local Aussie Pub so we got free bottle openers and key chains which was a fun perk to an otherwise disappointing day. My last 3 hours in Paris were far greater than the previous 48 combined so thank you Holly! I´m just chalking the rest of the day up to experience and glad to have seen good people!

Getting to the airport was another fun experience as I unknowling booked at the jenkiest place in rome. The companies over here should really use that old bank commercial with the "It´ll cost ya" line because the charge you for everything. 5€ for an online check in (which they require you to do), 15€ per checked bag, 3€ for a drink, 5€ for a hot dog, etc.

Then they also cut costs anywhere they can. For example let us analyze the following photo:
Most obviosuly, we have to walk to the plane. No big deal in normal conditions, but if it was pouring down rain I woulda been a little pissed. You can also notice the high quality of the boarding sign to Rome Ciampino airport. Finally, the budget minded airport decides garbage cans are too much of an expensise so they hang the bags around to suffice. Maybe I would have a little more positive review of the airline if the wings didn´t shake constantly through the whole flight and the passangers didn´t give the pilot a round of applause for a safe landing. But thats a big maybe...